Tweets - May 13th - I have not known myself

I have not known myself. I come to conclusions and then deliver them as truths. The issue is not the conclusions, but calling such things "truths". Heaven has voiced serious complaints against me because of this.

One of these conclusions I've recently jumped to is "walking by faith". I've been convincing myself to look past all of the years of violence and pain and abuse that has happened to me, and telling myself that I didn't need to be afraid and angry and sad because I can instead be "faithful". I even remember asking myself, "how am I being myself if I look past these things and 'walk by faith'".

I'm not talking about the simple act of trusting God, but rather the act of ignoring who and what I am.

I first noticed that there was an issue when I made the decision to "walk by faith and forget the history of Kelvin", and multiple spacecrafts began flying overhead with noticeably dim lights. I knew the consistently dim lights meant something, but I didn't know what.

Then came the quick flashes. I mentioned some time ago that those quick flashes are distractions - and that appears to be true in part - but it is now evident that those are also rebukes. This didn't really become clear until a few nights ago when a spacecraft flew overhead and flashed and flickered its lights in a way I hadn't seen before. Then I wondered if it was a rebuke, and a spacecraft flew overhead very fast in confirmation.

But what really sprang me into action was last night when a peach-colored spacecraft flew overhead. Nothing felt good about seeing that - but it forced me to ground myself and get to the bottom of the issues I was having. Based on the responses I had received over the last few days, I understood that I was having an emotional issue, an honesty issue, and a humanity issue. But seeing that peach-colored spacecraft forced me to think deeply about these things until I began to understand what was wrong. These things were on my mind when I fell asleep last night, and those same things were on my mind the second I awoke this morning. And I'm so thankful that such measures were taken.

We are all human. We are all right here in this same world all together. The tragedies of this world are because of the insistence of God's rejection. We are all birthed from sad and angry mothers, have sad and angry friends, and have sad and angry people who rule themselves over us. They are sad and angry because they live in a world that is the physical embodiment of "GOD'S REJECTION", though they may never see it this way.

The only thing that separates me from you is that I am under Grace and you are not. I don't say this to be bold or boastful, but it is true, and it might help with whatever understanding one can gather from hearing a stranger talk about seeing a peach-colored UFO.

A world that is rejected by God produces a people who are broken and sad and filled with pain. Being under Grace does not change this fact; being under Grace has no affect nor impact on our humanity. I don't even know who I am without the remembrance of this pain, the attachment of this pain. I am not free from it, and the only reason I am not free from it is because God has not delivered me from it. And I cannot free myself, at least not that I have ever known. But when God does deliver me, who will I be? I suppose a human male walking naked in a Garden, surrounded by loving gazes and gentle deeds.

I can attest to the fact that being under Grace does sprout up periods of joy. I may be sad and frustrated at times, embarrassed and uncomfortable at times, but I am no longer broken and destroyed. I am given the time and space and liberty to understand God and the Garden of God. I have no desire to drink myself into oblivion or take copious amounts of drugs to hide from this reality. Though alone, I am healed, I am always being healed, I am blessed, and I am being blessed - even my softening flesh sings the Glory of the Living God.

Being under Grace does not change our nature, but what I have found is that it gives me a reason to always be a decent human being, in spite of where I come from. I am to understand my discomforts, understand my sadness and my frustrations, understand why I am the way I am - why I feel the way I feel in that moment, step back and be a decent human being, doing justice.

God's faithfulness has taught me that God is unquestionably and unwaveringly God. Salvation comes by way of God's faithfulness. And my experience has taught me that I only need to do justice and wait for God. But even in this, I do not always do good; I do not always see myself.

I only ever need to be myself - to know myself, to accept myself, and to be myself - and then be a decent human being in spite of the pain, the embarrassment, the sadness, the terror, this discomfort, the frustration, and the anger. I am a human being and I am allowed to be a human being.

I am thankful to heaven for confirming tonight and for lifting my spirits by shining a light as bright as Venus and flying across the sky, not dimming for a second.

Tweets - April 14th - Burn their asses

When I was around 15 years old (1994/95), I was in church one Sunday with my mother, grandmother, and some of my grandmother's sisters, and a guest prophet named Todd Hall came to visit and preach. I'm not sure if I'd ever seen a prophet before, but I was intrigued. 

He proclaimed, "In the year 2000, all the homosexuals in the world are going to be burned alive in fire. God is going to burn them up!" The church cheered and shouted and celebrated, "Praise God!", "Praise the Lord!!", "Hallelujah!!!". Some "spoke in tongues", and others "went in the spirit" in demonstration of the worthwhile power of God in the Church.

Wouldn't that just be lovely? If God finally took his thumb out of his ass and did something like burn up all the fags, setting them all ablaze for all the world to witness, then the Bride of Jesus Christ could finally rest. Easy, peasy, done.

There would be no more gay marriages, no need for legislation changes, no need for all the arguing and fighting and protesting, no need for the constant violence against openly trans and gay folks, no need to burn books or shut down libraries, no need to protect children from the dancing and singing drag queens. Wouldn't it be lovely?

Please, please, Jesus, please set their asses on fire! It's an easy fix problem. Even Prophet Todd understood that it was an easy fix problem. 2000 years of fags ravaging the earth, sucking each other off - burn them up Lord!! Why wait for hell tomorrow what could be done today?!

But here we are, 23 years later. 23 years waiting for God to do what God said he would do. For 2,023 years, God could have slid his thumb out of his ass and done anything about the fag problem - anything at all. Prophet after prophet after prophet have been speaking and shouting and proclaiming, and still not a peep from God - no help at all. Not a single fag was burned alive by God - not even one! How shameful of God. I guess that means it's now a prophet's problem and a prophet's job to take matters into his own hands: "Let's rile up the masses!", "We are the power of God now!" (says his heart and his deeds, not his mouth).

Could you imagine someone like Isaiah or Micah being so impatient with God, so used to God doing absolutely nothing, that they took up the sword and started killing Israelites themselves? "Israel will be plowed like a field", said Micah. "If God doesn't plow it then I will do the plowing myself and convince the powers that be to help me do it", said American prophets.

What is a Bride who can't lean on the help of her husband, but turns to the help of so many other men; so many other powerful men? What is a Bride who thinks about her husband and says, "He will never help me, so I will get in bed with whatever rich and powerful man that will help me"? Such a Bride would be called an Adulterous Whore. The Whore of Jesus Christ.

But in reality, she had no opportunity to become an adulterous whore. Yes, she sucks off whomever promises to give her whatever she asks for, but an adulterous whore requires one to be married. Christ divorced her long ago, and long gave up the idea of ever coming back for her. She has no lover. She doesn't even love herself. She loves her family for the most part - but there is no equal love to be found within her. She has long since forgotten Christ, what he sounded like, what he acted like. So she makes things up about him, all kinds of lies, and has been doing so from the very beginning. Just look at her scriptures: "God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged natural relations for that which is contrary to nature, and likewise the men, too, abandoned natural relations with women and burned in their desire toward one another, males with males committing shameful acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error."

She says whatever she wants about him because she can. She has always been ashamed of him - ashamed of his baptism - ashamed of his repentance - ashamed of his kindness - ashamed of him being nonjudgmental - ashamed of his partying and drinking - ashamed of his law breaking. She never wanted him for who he is. So she was long rejected by both Christ and God. And if God is the business of sending folks to hell for sucking dick, then we can be certain that God will send her there first since she has been sucking dick for 2000 years, and the longest a fag sucks dick is for what, 60 years?

Tweets - April 11th - Bitcoin Offense

Regarding NY Times Post: https://www.nytimes.com/2023/04/09/business/bitcoin-mining-electricity-pollution.html?smtyp=cur&smid=tw-nytimes

I found this very offensive - offended by the idea of propping up the fossil fuel industry for a few bitcoin miners, and offended by the lack of justice and care.

So I said to God that these people do not love the world, they do not care for the world. So I asked God for the beginning of the Garden, the path of the Garden, so that that they might do justice in the Earth, and I asked God to send 130 degree heat to Texas.

I know that there are already plans in place, and I'm curious to see exactly what God will do. I know that I can be naive, and that I lack both the nuance and the foresight to truly understand what I've asked for.

But this never seemed to matter to God, who has always met me right where I am - never forcing me to be anywhere I don't want to be - always moving me forward. To me, this was an easy ask - though not straightforward, so I rely on God's understanding and judgment.

Tweets - April 4th - Bat Kol

Response to Brent's tweet: https://twitter.com/bkherbert99/status/1643206689225596928

Did you know that these roars occurred so frequently in Israel in the first century that the Jews named the event. They called it, "Bat Kol", which means "Daughter of the voice".

I came across this info maybe a decade ago, reading on something in the talmud (I don't remember what I was looking for), and this "Bat Kol" caught my attention.

I haven't heard those roars since I lived in Beltsville, maybe 2007 or 2008. I likened it to standing under a rocket while it was taking off, because, besides the noise, you could feel the sound penetrate your bones. So I would say that even the deaf could hear God roar.

Heaven has had a very heuristic approach in the way that they instruct. We watch, we experience, we mess up, we experience, we mess up, we learn.

No one has ever commanded me to do anything. If that were the case, someone could have spared me from the mild food poisoning a few weeks ago by commanding me not to eat that sandwich that was sitting out in the sun for hours. We learn.

Besides the impact on our liberty as human beings, it's also quite risky for God or heaven to deliver commands - especially with all the lying devils on the loose and their eager prophets.

"It's OK for God to command us to do good." But we see what happens in this world when people's definition of "good" becomes objective and non-negotiable.

When I was sternly rebuked last summer, it caused me to examine myself over and over. But no one ever told me to do anything - not even in these last nearly 20 years. They have built in me the Garden of God through power and liberty.

If God is going to be so pissed that God roars and shakes the Earth, I find it difficult to think that it's because you haven't been speaking to Christians and their bad-mouthed prophets (who have been ignoring you for 30 years).

If anything, I find it more likely that God would roar because of the violence of those people and because someone like you needed to even speak to them in the first place.

But it does appear you associated your guilt of not speaking with the sound from heaven. I think that if there is ever a sense of urgency from heaven, it will be plainly and completely clear. If what happened is clear to you, then it is clear.

I make no true claim of knowing anything other than what I experience and what I witness. (This is not to discourage you - even if it were possible - from being honest with a dishonest people.)

As for me, I may join you in your pursuit of being honest with them, but I won't fight with them. And if they want to fight, I will be quiet, lie down, and let them have their punches and kicks.

I intend to go back to my roots and give people exactly what they ask for: You want rain? You will have rain. I want them to understand God as I understand God, even more clearly (assuming that what I want matters).

Tweets - March 22nd - Faith and Truth

If it isn't the intense anger in this place, it's the fear - but usually a mix of both to the destruction of the whole world. There is no possibility of faithfulness here (at the moment). The dark is just too dark. The darkness is so deep that it absorbs every ray of light.

These people claim they are faithful and that God is with them, but their faithlessness is plain to me, and God treats them like overgrown weeds in a lawn: mowed over, plucked up, or poisoned - all leading to death.

But one thing I know for sure is that darkness belongs to God just as much as light, and God will be glorified in darkness and through darkness, and in light and through light - to the salvation of all flesh, of all generations.

To add to the truthfulness of this, I remember heaven clearly saying to me, "You can show them", accompanied by an extremely bright light of a spacecraft.

As one of those psalmists said: "You have encircled me. If I say, 'Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, and the light around me will be night,' even darkness is not dark to You, and the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You." ~ Psalm 139

By faith, I've come to the conclusion that I will just be honest with people. Earlier this month, I said to heaven, "The Garden of God is not worrying about what you'll think, or what you'll do, or what you'll say." Angels agreed by becoming luminous and bright in response.

I've been spending time with myself, understanding (as much as I have) why I am the way I am - why I feel what I feel when I feel it - why I do what I do when I do it - it continually leads me to lean further on God's faithfulness.

I'm not blind and I know that people find my behavior strange at times - I see it in their faces and in their reactions. At this point I'm partly used to it.

But truth-telling comes with woes in this world, even when said in love (as I prefer to not do a lot of "talking at" anyone, but rather conversing with).

I am not a bullshitter, and I don't have deep opinions of many things. So I am easily confused by a lot of words and concepts that mean many different things to people. We will not be debating.

I prefer to speak and think plainly and ask straightforward questions, so I have sometimes watched (in my own amazement) people become humbled and quiet when I've spoken to them (in conversation). I have also watched people never speak to me again, and avoid even looking my way.

Everything is important, everything is a big deal. There is truth in everything, in all of your experiences. Do not hide from it.

What I have come to understand is that if I do not view you as my equal, then there can never be complete honesty. If I am beneath you, then I cannot be completely honest with you. If I am above you, then I cannot be completely honest with you or myself.

Many parents and leaders in this world have made themselves authoritarian figures - and there are other ways to lead.

I'm set on no longer getting tense and tight-lipped when people ask me questions that would make one uncomfortable in my shoes. My rest is God's faithfulness.

My hope is to see the Garden of God sprout up in this generation, right under my feet. This Garden is my community, my community of faithful lovers, my community of loving care and upbuilding, my community of those who pursue justice at every turn.

Tweets - February 16th - Jesus loves you

https://twitter.com/davenewworld_2/status/1626196077501202435

Yes, sending someone to shout "Jesus loves you!!!!!" in my face while I'm eating was the absolute best idea that God could come up with. For God to simply show me deep, tender, powerful, faithful, and compassionate love was simply out of the question.

No, love is sending someone to shout in my face because love is ultimately nothing more than not sending me to hell for a billion-billion-billion years and giving me some singular, sole version of heaven that doesn't align with my character - and certainly not my sexuality.

(I'm assuming, of course, I won't be turned into a real-life Ken doll having nothing more than a bump where my dick should be.)

You know, none of us asked to be here. None of us were given any options whatsoever before we were born. None of us were shown life beforehand and the ways of God beforehand.

Nothing was presented to us beforehand regarding heaven and hell that we might make an informed decision between an eternity in heaven and an eternity in hell - allowing us the option to opt out of human life if we didn't want to take the risk.

"Upon my preliminary evaluation, dear Lord, I think I'll pass. I'd rather be a dog or just not exist."

But the way it's told, not only are we forced into this existence, but we are forced to either comply with unreasonable commands from God or be forced to endure a trillion-trillion years of tormenting fire -- and this is what is said to be the love of God, the only option of God, the perfect plan of God, the best and brightest idea that God could come up with.

"Lord, what if I just want to be human? Can I commune and make love however I want? Can I live and decline prayers and penance and worship and unprovable baseless claims in exchange for the liberty you give ALL other life in this world - and not be tossed into the fire?". 

"Absolutely fucking not!", saith the Lord.

No option was presented to us - and we certainly can't opt out after we're born - and your momma can't opt out for you after you're conceived - otherwise you (or your momma) risk a trillion-trillion years of tormenting fire.

If God wants a fruit-bearing peach tree planted in the middle of a dry desert, God does not need to instruct you or anyone else to replenish the soil, plant a seedling, haul truckloads of water, and setup a massive solar powered AC unit to maintain appropriate outdoor temps.

God has an entire universe at God's disposal and is able to ensure that not only will there be a peach tree planted in the middle of dry desert, but that it will prosper and bear fruit. God has never needed your assistance to do God's work.

With regard to God, the only acceptable thing you need be concerned with at the moment is to walk according to the faith given to you, be HONEST, and be a witness (sharing plainly what you have seen God do and what you see God doing - both the wonderful and the awful).

Tweets - January 31st - Repentance

I began writing this on Jan 20, and debated posting until I had results:

If you are ever in conversation with angels, and they do the quick flash thing, it's their way of distracting your line of thinking. The brighter the flash, the more important the distraction it seems.

For instance, a few years ago when I was in the middle of insulting myself - a very quick very bright flash came. "There are just more important things to be concerned with."

Of course, it doesn't mean you HAVE to change your course of thinking, but I would advise you to accept the wisdom - especially if you can be certain it was angels speaking with you.

And you can be certain by continuing to think and continuing to have your discussions (with heaven/with God/with yourself); you'll end up where you need to be. This has been my experience over the years.

Tonight was no exception. I forgot what I was talking about before the flash came. It wasn't a very bright flash, but it was just bright enough to catch my attention.

But then I moved on to justice, and I later said, "You know, for me, justice has always been to stop doing what causes harm" and a spacecraft became luminous and bright and flew out from behind the leafless trees and flew overhead.

While outside, my eyebrows began itching. Earlier in the day I wondered (again) if the dermatitis on my skin is a matter of justice, or if it is a matter of waiting to be healed - God is glorified either way - and my faith is in the faithfulness of God.

I said to myself, "I wonder if it's something I'm eating". A spacecraft flew, but the response was a bit inconclusive to me. And I said, "This has been going on since my 20s. What new thing did I begin in my 20s??"

I was puzzled - because my diet was the same from childhood up until that point - only except it wasn't.

In my early 20s I dieted because of historical pain and shame and humiliation, and a low-carb diet was my diet of choice.

Doing low-carb, I took a liking to sucralose (the sweetener found in Splenda) because it tasted the most like sugar, it didn't give me a headache (like aspartame), and I still lost weight.

I haven't eaten a low-carb diet in years, but I still consume sucralose as my sweetener of choice because I drink coffee in the morning and cold tea almost daily, and I use sucralose in both. I also use sucralose in cooking to balance dishes that require it.

Not much thought about it until tonight - and I say "not much thought" because I questioned it before, and searched for correlations between sucralose and dermatitis and found nothing - so I haven't thought about it.

So I will see how it goes, to see if sucralose is actually the culprit. My rest is God's faithfulness - and I am only able do justice when I know what is just.

Repentance is always justice, it is always deed; and if repentance is not performed through justice then it is not repentance and it remains unacceptable to God.

To the flowers in God's Garden, the community of faithful lovers: You are who you are. Why do you apologize so often? Can you apologize for being yourself?

It is you who needs to change if you are to effectively change the behavioral patterns you know are harmful (for which you so often apologize). Trying to force yourself to not be yourself is not a worthwhile long-term solution.

Know yourself, seek out the roots of what make you you so that you can begin to understand why you do the things you do. Lean on God's faithfulness in every moment, and walk.

My own goal, through God's Glory, is to never ever again walk according to the pain given me, but only to walk according to the faith given me.

It is becoming more and more apparent to me that I am to show people how to repent - "Sodom" especially - and maybe others.

God has hardened your heart, covered your eyes, and clogged your ears - so I know that you cannot hear right now.

My hope is not that you will repent (by watching me), but rather, in the hour God softens your heart, uncovers your eyes, and opens your ears - through peace, circumstance, or terror - you will know exactly how to repent.