Friend said to me: "U remember a long time ago when we were leaving six flags one night and you called me and asked me if I saw the lights in the sky and told u I saw two comets, did that pertain to the lights u always see in the sky or did u consider it that night to b comets?"
I responded: "I don't remember this at all! I remember seeing that star which spiraled off into space (back in 1999) - but I don't remember calling you about it."
Wednesday, December 14, 2016
A prophecy - Walking on Water
Written June 7, 2006 - a prophecy that I did not understand at the time, but I have long since walked on water, though I am too far out in the distance for anyone to see me.
I was in the middle of the ocean surrounded by thousands,
Each one of us was treading water endlessly.
I looked in the distance and saw a man walking on water!
He walked closer and I saw that it was one of my brothers.
Seeing me, he came to me.
He bent over, stretched out his hand, and said, “Walk with me.”
I looked at his hand, and then I looked at his face in total confusion.
I said to him, “That’s impossible.”
He asked me, “Why is it impossible?”
I said to him, “It’s impossible because man cannot walk on water.”
He stood upright and said, “If it were impossible for man, I would not be able to do it.”
He said to me, “There was a time when you couldn’t tread water.
But when you saw thousands treading water, it was no longer impossible.
It became very much possible, and you learned to do it.
There was a time when you couldn’t walk at all.
But when you saw thousands walking, it was no longer impossible.
It became very much possible, and you learned to do it.”
He said to me, “Seeing is believing.
You ignore the truth that is in your face and accept the words of those who tread water.
You see me, in your face, walking on water and you say, ‘That’s impossible.’
If you keep your faulty logic, you will drown with the thousands around you.”
So he bent over, stretched out his hand, and said, “Walk with me.”
I listened,
I stretched out my hand and he pulled me to the surface of the water.
But when he let go, I sunk beneath the water and swam back up.
He said to me, “You will learn to do this.
I saw when you learned to walk on land, and I will see you walk on water.
For today is a day of small beginnings.”
I was in the middle of the ocean surrounded by thousands,
Each one of us was treading water endlessly.
I looked in the distance and saw a man walking on water!
He walked closer and I saw that it was one of my brothers.
Seeing me, he came to me.
He bent over, stretched out his hand, and said, “Walk with me.”
I looked at his hand, and then I looked at his face in total confusion.
I said to him, “That’s impossible.”
He asked me, “Why is it impossible?”
I said to him, “It’s impossible because man cannot walk on water.”
He stood upright and said, “If it were impossible for man, I would not be able to do it.”
He said to me, “There was a time when you couldn’t tread water.
But when you saw thousands treading water, it was no longer impossible.
It became very much possible, and you learned to do it.
There was a time when you couldn’t walk at all.
But when you saw thousands walking, it was no longer impossible.
It became very much possible, and you learned to do it.”
He said to me, “Seeing is believing.
You ignore the truth that is in your face and accept the words of those who tread water.
You see me, in your face, walking on water and you say, ‘That’s impossible.’
If you keep your faulty logic, you will drown with the thousands around you.”
So he bent over, stretched out his hand, and said, “Walk with me.”
I listened,
I stretched out my hand and he pulled me to the surface of the water.
But when he let go, I sunk beneath the water and swam back up.
He said to me, “You will learn to do this.
I saw when you learned to walk on land, and I will see you walk on water.
For today is a day of small beginnings.”
Do I pray?
I found something that I wrote exactly 10 years ago. December 14, 2006.
A friend of mine asked me twice if I prayed, I was never really sure how to answer - but this is the type of thing I say to my God, especially at night:
Yahweh, my God, how should I speak? The oppressed will not be plundered forever, neither will the poor always curse their own life. You will never bless a man in war, neither will You ever tell a killer, "I will make you victorious." Yahweh, You will never share Your glory with an idol, neither will Your strong hand ever be called 'common'. Everyday, You look deep within the hearts of mankind and search to see if anyone seeks Your face; but everyday You sigh because the Earth has ignored You - and for thousands of years, the Earth has forgotten You.
At the age of 19, You slightly lifted the veil that covered my face, and I was completely astonished by what You revealed above me - but I would let nothing hinder my faith in my idol God. For my idol was the lord of my life, and it was in him that I put my trust - though he showed me nothing nearly as astonishing as You did. I felt 'his presence' everyday, and I praised my idol's name everywhere I went - I just knew that my idol had power and loved me. I knew that my idol had healing in his hands, and would bless me with many financial gifts according to his own riches and glory. But then you took the veil that separated me from You, Yahweh, and tied it around my head tightly, and You made a decree to the hosts of the heavens to show nothing more above me until I searched for You.
I spent a year after serving my idol as a quiet being - completely void of any knowledge and in total confusion, but I am now 27, and I am confused no more. The hosts have been told by You, Yahweh, 'Show him,' and the veil was quickly removed – and I am astonished everyday. To this day, I am my own work in progress because I have seen in You what I desire to see in myself. The psalmist said to You in his wisdom, "When You said, 'Seek My face,' my heart said to You,'Your face, O Yahweh, I shall seek.'" ~ Psalm 27:8
A friend of mine asked me twice if I prayed, I was never really sure how to answer - but this is the type of thing I say to my God, especially at night:
Yahweh, my God, how should I speak? The oppressed will not be plundered forever, neither will the poor always curse their own life. You will never bless a man in war, neither will You ever tell a killer, "I will make you victorious." Yahweh, You will never share Your glory with an idol, neither will Your strong hand ever be called 'common'. Everyday, You look deep within the hearts of mankind and search to see if anyone seeks Your face; but everyday You sigh because the Earth has ignored You - and for thousands of years, the Earth has forgotten You.
At the age of 19, You slightly lifted the veil that covered my face, and I was completely astonished by what You revealed above me - but I would let nothing hinder my faith in my idol God. For my idol was the lord of my life, and it was in him that I put my trust - though he showed me nothing nearly as astonishing as You did. I felt 'his presence' everyday, and I praised my idol's name everywhere I went - I just knew that my idol had power and loved me. I knew that my idol had healing in his hands, and would bless me with many financial gifts according to his own riches and glory. But then you took the veil that separated me from You, Yahweh, and tied it around my head tightly, and You made a decree to the hosts of the heavens to show nothing more above me until I searched for You.
I spent a year after serving my idol as a quiet being - completely void of any knowledge and in total confusion, but I am now 27, and I am confused no more. The hosts have been told by You, Yahweh, 'Show him,' and the veil was quickly removed – and I am astonished everyday. To this day, I am my own work in progress because I have seen in You what I desire to see in myself. The psalmist said to You in his wisdom, "When You said, 'Seek My face,' my heart said to You,'Your face, O Yahweh, I shall seek.'" ~ Psalm 27:8
Thursday, November 24, 2016
How to murder the righteous: 101
First, a demagogue must set himself in power through persuasive and cunning promises. He must then find a small but loyal team of men and women to back him up by offering them gifts, such as money and authority. At this point he'll need to get the trust of the majority, even those who previously hated him; so he must round up the poor, the defenseless, those living in ghettos and slums, and those living paycheck to paycheck and give them jobs, clean water, homes, and food. He must then give a little control to both the wealthy and the religious leaders, but not nearly as much as he gives to his loyal team.
Now that he has the eyes and ears of the majority, he must not fall on his promises to the poor and those who struggle, and he must give them some form of power and control - but not nearly as much as he gives the wealthy and religious leaders. So he'll hint to the poor that if they serve his ideals, they can be violent against those who oppose him, the one who showers them with love and provides them a little bit of heaven on Earth, without too much legal consequence (since he has manipulative power over the justice system). Of course, there can't be too much violence - since wolves like to dress up as sheep for as long as possible - and no demagogue wants to appear as a wolf. Blatant violence belongs to the demagogue and him alone - only he can authorize the death of thousands and still be lauded - no such praise can ever be given to the poor or the commoner.
At this point, the major media companies, who cater to the majority and the wealthy, will praise the demagogue they once unashamedly mocked. For they too will be blessed by his wonderful gifts. The media, along with the religious leaders, will inspire many of those who hate the demagogue to fall in absolute love with him. At this point, now that he has both the media and the religious, he truly has the majority and the violence can begin.
He'll start his treacheries by ignoring the beatings and the killings of the righteous prostitutes, the righteous porn stars, and of course, the righteous fags. He'll then deny them many liberties which will cause them to march and protest. Then the wolf will half-way take off his coat of wool and freely allow them to be beat and murdered in the streets by both law enforcement and the commoner. The media and the religious leaders will continue to praise him for standing up against such gross human conduct. Those who preach love on the streets and in pulpits will turn a blind eye to those they truly hate. That which was hidden will be brought to light.
Now, by having control over several situations, he'll need to control how people spend money - because the rich must get richer, and the poor must have jobs and homes, otherwise there will be chaos. So he'll do just that - he'll take off his coat of wool and control how money is spent, and if anyone doesn't like it, they'll have to go hungry or live on scraps. How it will be controlled is beyond my understanding at the moment, but whatever it becomes, it will support and finance his ideals.
But none of this can go on forever. The wealthy and the commoner cannot grow wealthier together ad infinitum. So as protests, violence and advances in military technologies increase, do not be surprised to see robotized cops in the form of automated guns attached to rooftops and drones crawling the streets and flying over your heads (since the wealthy and the military prefer robots working for them rather than human hands). As we all know, the solution to violence on this planet is not restorative justice, which costs a lot of money, but rather more violence, which costs less.
As it was said, "He who lives by the sword will die by the sword", and "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".
Now that he has the eyes and ears of the majority, he must not fall on his promises to the poor and those who struggle, and he must give them some form of power and control - but not nearly as much as he gives the wealthy and religious leaders. So he'll hint to the poor that if they serve his ideals, they can be violent against those who oppose him, the one who showers them with love and provides them a little bit of heaven on Earth, without too much legal consequence (since he has manipulative power over the justice system). Of course, there can't be too much violence - since wolves like to dress up as sheep for as long as possible - and no demagogue wants to appear as a wolf. Blatant violence belongs to the demagogue and him alone - only he can authorize the death of thousands and still be lauded - no such praise can ever be given to the poor or the commoner.
At this point, the major media companies, who cater to the majority and the wealthy, will praise the demagogue they once unashamedly mocked. For they too will be blessed by his wonderful gifts. The media, along with the religious leaders, will inspire many of those who hate the demagogue to fall in absolute love with him. At this point, now that he has both the media and the religious, he truly has the majority and the violence can begin.
He'll start his treacheries by ignoring the beatings and the killings of the righteous prostitutes, the righteous porn stars, and of course, the righteous fags. He'll then deny them many liberties which will cause them to march and protest. Then the wolf will half-way take off his coat of wool and freely allow them to be beat and murdered in the streets by both law enforcement and the commoner. The media and the religious leaders will continue to praise him for standing up against such gross human conduct. Those who preach love on the streets and in pulpits will turn a blind eye to those they truly hate. That which was hidden will be brought to light.
Now, by having control over several situations, he'll need to control how people spend money - because the rich must get richer, and the poor must have jobs and homes, otherwise there will be chaos. So he'll do just that - he'll take off his coat of wool and control how money is spent, and if anyone doesn't like it, they'll have to go hungry or live on scraps. How it will be controlled is beyond my understanding at the moment, but whatever it becomes, it will support and finance his ideals.
But none of this can go on forever. The wealthy and the commoner cannot grow wealthier together ad infinitum. So as protests, violence and advances in military technologies increase, do not be surprised to see robotized cops in the form of automated guns attached to rooftops and drones crawling the streets and flying over your heads (since the wealthy and the military prefer robots working for them rather than human hands). As we all know, the solution to violence on this planet is not restorative justice, which costs a lot of money, but rather more violence, which costs less.
As it was said, "He who lives by the sword will die by the sword", and "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
Dragged through fire
Before anyone can really understand God on this planet, they must first be tossed in a blazing hot furnace. There doesn't appear to be any other way. Every prophet of the Living God, including Yeshua the Christ, was dragged through fire before they came out resembling pure gold.
I have been dragged through fire, and I'm sure Brent has been dragged through fire as well. It is something that must be done by God to man.
What's about to happen is that the entire world is going to be shaken and dragged through fire. God is going to get rid of wickedness on this planet - it will not persist ad infinitum. The refining process will need to be repeated several times on the people of this planet before they come out as pure as gold. In this, I am unsure what God is planning to do. It appears that most must be refined by death - it will be the only way they see the foolishness of their religions, doctrines, beliefs and bad behaviors.
Several years ago, Yahweh God showed me American bombs falling on Iran. I'm sure that God is involved in this for some reason - whatever the case may be - it is God's business. It might be possible that God will refine through fire a living remnant of people there - for many may perish. I'm pretty certain that there's something I'm not seeing with Iran - something hasn't clicked yet.
I have been dragged through fire, and I'm sure Brent has been dragged through fire as well. It is something that must be done by God to man.
What's about to happen is that the entire world is going to be shaken and dragged through fire. God is going to get rid of wickedness on this planet - it will not persist ad infinitum. The refining process will need to be repeated several times on the people of this planet before they come out as pure as gold. In this, I am unsure what God is planning to do. It appears that most must be refined by death - it will be the only way they see the foolishness of their religions, doctrines, beliefs and bad behaviors.
Several years ago, Yahweh God showed me American bombs falling on Iran. I'm sure that God is involved in this for some reason - whatever the case may be - it is God's business. It might be possible that God will refine through fire a living remnant of people there - for many may perish. I'm pretty certain that there's something I'm not seeing with Iran - something hasn't clicked yet.
Sunday, November 20, 2016
Snakes
“When you go out to battle against your enemies, and Yahweh your God delivers them into your hands and you take them away captive, and see among the captives a beautiful woman, and have a desire for her and would take her as a wife for yourself, then you shall bring her home to your house, and she shall shave her head and trim her nails. She shall also remove the clothes of her captivity and shall remain in your house, and mourn her father and mother a full month; and after that you may go in to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife. It shall be, if you are not pleased with her, then you shall let her go wherever she wishes; but you shall certainly not sell her for money, you shall not mistreat her, because you have humbled her." (Deuteronomy 21)
For future reference, if you hear a voice from heaven telling you kill men and women, then rape-fuck their teenage daughters, I assure you, it was not God. There is no authority in "heaven". Deuteronomy is one of those books cooked up by war-mongering fig-leaf peddling snakes. Feel free to rip it out and toss it in the flames (along with Numbers and Leviticus - 2 books that teach people that God struggles with forgiveness requiring the brutal murder of animals and Mary's children because it gets him off and he can't forgive anyone otherwise.)
"Thus says Yahweh, the God of Israel, 'Add your burnt offerings to your sacrifices and eat flesh. For I did not speak to your fathers, or command them in the day that I brought them out of the land of Egypt, concerning burnt offerings and sacrifices.'" (Jeremiah - Chapter 7)
"How can you say, ‘We are wise, and the law of Yahweh is with us’? But behold, the lying pen of the scribes has made it into a lie." (Jeremiah - Chapter 8)
For future reference, if you hear a voice from heaven telling you kill men and women, then rape-fuck their teenage daughters, I assure you, it was not God. There is no authority in "heaven". Deuteronomy is one of those books cooked up by war-mongering fig-leaf peddling snakes. Feel free to rip it out and toss it in the flames (along with Numbers and Leviticus - 2 books that teach people that God struggles with forgiveness requiring the brutal murder of animals and Mary's children because it gets him off and he can't forgive anyone otherwise.)
"Thus says Yahweh, the God of Israel, 'Add your burnt offerings to your sacrifices and eat flesh. For I did not speak to your fathers, or command them in the day that I brought them out of the land of Egypt, concerning burnt offerings and sacrifices.'" (Jeremiah - Chapter 7)
"How can you say, ‘We are wise, and the law of Yahweh is with us’? But behold, the lying pen of the scribes has made it into a lie." (Jeremiah - Chapter 8)
Wheels and Tumults
"As I looked, behold, a storm wind was coming from the north, a great cloud with fire flashing forth continually and a bright light around it, and in its midst something like glowing metal in the midst of the fire. Within it there were figures resembling four living beings. And this was their appearance: they had human form. Now as I looked at the living beings, behold, there was one wheel on the earth beside the living beings, for each of the four of them. Whenever they moved, they moved in any of their four directions without turning as they moved. As for their rims they were lofty and awesome, and the rims of all four of them were full of eyes round about. Whenever the living beings moved, the wheels moved with them. And whenever the living beings rose from the earth, the wheels rose also. Wherever the spirit was about to go, they would go in that direction. And the wheels rose close beside them; for the spirit of the living beings was in the wheels. Whenever those went, these went; and whenever those stood still, these stood still. And whenever those rose from the earth, the wheels rose close beside them; for the spirit of the living beings was in the wheels." (Ezekiel - Chapter 1)
Hard to describe, huh? Yall even tried describing God's roar by saying it's like thunder, or large tumults of water, or large teams of horses running because that's the only thing you could compare it to. I would say its more like standing under a rocket when its about to take off - it shakes the whole city and you feel it all through your bones - perhaps people will describe it differently a few years from now when those who ditch their fig leaves are brutally persecuted. I believe you anyways, only because I can relate brotha.
"When He utters His voice, there is a tumult of waters in the heavens, and He causes the clouds to ascend from the end of the earth; He makes lightning for the rain and brings forth the wind from His storehouses." (Jeremiah 51:16)
Hard to describe, huh? Yall even tried describing God's roar by saying it's like thunder, or large tumults of water, or large teams of horses running because that's the only thing you could compare it to. I would say its more like standing under a rocket when its about to take off - it shakes the whole city and you feel it all through your bones - perhaps people will describe it differently a few years from now when those who ditch their fig leaves are brutally persecuted. I believe you anyways, only because I can relate brotha.
"When He utters His voice, there is a tumult of waters in the heavens, and He causes the clouds to ascend from the end of the earth; He makes lightning for the rain and brings forth the wind from His storehouses." (Jeremiah 51:16)
Having a moment
Faithfulness is like a light switch that only God can turn on. It is not belief, but trust. It belongs to God but is shared with the person whom God chooses. The messengers of God (as I have called them over the years) flying above us in those spacecrafts, and Christ with them, are faithful. It is not something that abandons us in the Garden, but it is the same faith given to us on Earth as it is in 'heaven'. The faith God requires of us here, right now, is the same faith that God requires of us 500 years from now while we are walking barefoot in the grasses of God's Garden - to speak symbolically of those living eternally, flesh and all.
Monday, November 14, 2016
God and Sex
Ever since I was a little kid, I've enjoyed the male body - this was heightened when I hit my teen years. I've always had this ability to talk men into taking their clothes off. Even as a little boy, I could talk other boys (who only liked girls as far as I could tell) into taking their clothes off. I realized at an early age that if I wanted to see another boy naked, then I'd have to provide an incentive. Now, as a boy, I had no incentives of my own to offer other boys, who only enjoyed the female body, so I would talk a girl into taking her clothes off. Then by getting the girls to agree with taking off their clothes, I would very easily get the other boys to follow suit.
A friend of mine has often called me, "The Puppet Master", then he'd gesture his fingers as if he were working a marionette, and he'd say, "Dance puppets!" Because as an adult, I could (and probably still can) convince a room full of men to drop their pants. I honestly don't know how many pants-dropping, cock-sucking orgies I've started just by uttering a few words to a few people. Now, I've never been a great looking guy, so again, I've often needed an incentive to pull off stunts like that. The incentive was either other men or other women who were attractive or tugging at specific people's sensual curiosities (I'd carefully observe and see who was mutually attracted to whom, and convince them to kiss). If I could get them to drop their draws/panties, then I could get the whole room of people to follow suit. People have often been comfortable around me, as I've only ever been gently persuasive. The friend who calls me, "The Puppet Master" often brings up the time I was on his balcony with a few other men and women - and I managed to persuade everyone to kiss and fondle everyone else. He then humorously complains about all the "mess" I caused on his balcony that night. It was even my first time tonguing down a girl - I was very surprised at how strong of a kisser she was. The men and the women, the younger and the older, the beautiful and the not-so-beautiful all alike enjoyed that evening.
As for why I often did this, it was usually just to see other men naked and to get a kiss. I've always found kissing to be very pleasurable - sex is more fun than pleasurable (to me), but a deep sensual kiss is stimulating and can make my toes curl.
This is one of my character traits that I've had since childhood, and it's one that God has found to be beautifully acceptable.
Why is it beautifully acceptable? Well, just ask yourself. If the "one and true god" that you serve did not have any of those dehumanizing sex laws, would you find satisfaction in viewing the naked male or female form without a second thought? You see, I always thought it was right to include everyone - didn't matter if you were a stunning 25 year-old or a 70 year-old - if you were with me, you were gonna be tonguing down someone, or at the very least, getting an eye-full of live action pleasure.
Even though God has found my behavior to be acceptable, many people do not. They'd prefer I follow those dehumanizing sex laws where I must get married to some woman and have penis-to-vagina sex with only that woman for the rest of my life or be cursed to burn in hell for billions of years. Yet here I am - acceptable to the Living God - gay, polyamorous, and I will never be married.
I've often wondered how all those anti-gay preachers and other religious folk expect homosexuals to deal with heterosexual marriage. Would any of them want their mothers or sisters or daughters to get married to a man they know is gay? Do the women really want to get married to a man they know for damn sure doesn't find women (including her) attractive, or even sexually appealing? How does this work? They have a fat chance in hell in thinking that they can get homosexuals to abstain from having sex while the rest of the world is fucking and cock-sucking away. Fat chance! Especially with someone like me around encouraging men to kiss and rub each other's dicks and grab each other's asses. Fat fucking chance!
They say the anus is for waste - and it is, but so is the penis. You always hear them shouting, "the anus should not be used for pleasure or sex", but when it comes to the mouth, you don't hear a whisper or peep from them. For even the most stuck-up socially conservative preacher enjoys a good blow job. Most of us enjoy getting a blowjob or getting our clits licked and sucked - needless to say. If you refuse to be human, and follow those dehumanizing sex laws and encourage others to follow them as well, then you can't live in God's Garden - God won't have it, and God's people won't have it either. Those who do not go on to live in God's Garden will live in the grave.
God desires gentle lambs who enjoy the pastures that have been prepared for them - but if those lambs refuse to live as lambs and live unnaturally as wolves who consume other lambs, then they will be denied to eat continually from God's pastures. For it was not God who told them to live as wolves, but it was wolves who convinced lambs to become wolves. Some wolves have been so disastrously corrupted that they are no longer baby wolves, but have become full-grown wolves and will require wrath and death before even a single strand of white wool sprouts again.
A friend of mine has often called me, "The Puppet Master", then he'd gesture his fingers as if he were working a marionette, and he'd say, "Dance puppets!" Because as an adult, I could (and probably still can) convince a room full of men to drop their pants. I honestly don't know how many pants-dropping, cock-sucking orgies I've started just by uttering a few words to a few people. Now, I've never been a great looking guy, so again, I've often needed an incentive to pull off stunts like that. The incentive was either other men or other women who were attractive or tugging at specific people's sensual curiosities (I'd carefully observe and see who was mutually attracted to whom, and convince them to kiss). If I could get them to drop their draws/panties, then I could get the whole room of people to follow suit. People have often been comfortable around me, as I've only ever been gently persuasive. The friend who calls me, "The Puppet Master" often brings up the time I was on his balcony with a few other men and women - and I managed to persuade everyone to kiss and fondle everyone else. He then humorously complains about all the "mess" I caused on his balcony that night. It was even my first time tonguing down a girl - I was very surprised at how strong of a kisser she was. The men and the women, the younger and the older, the beautiful and the not-so-beautiful all alike enjoyed that evening.
As for why I often did this, it was usually just to see other men naked and to get a kiss. I've always found kissing to be very pleasurable - sex is more fun than pleasurable (to me), but a deep sensual kiss is stimulating and can make my toes curl.
This is one of my character traits that I've had since childhood, and it's one that God has found to be beautifully acceptable.
Why is it beautifully acceptable? Well, just ask yourself. If the "one and true god" that you serve did not have any of those dehumanizing sex laws, would you find satisfaction in viewing the naked male or female form without a second thought? You see, I always thought it was right to include everyone - didn't matter if you were a stunning 25 year-old or a 70 year-old - if you were with me, you were gonna be tonguing down someone, or at the very least, getting an eye-full of live action pleasure.
Even though God has found my behavior to be acceptable, many people do not. They'd prefer I follow those dehumanizing sex laws where I must get married to some woman and have penis-to-vagina sex with only that woman for the rest of my life or be cursed to burn in hell for billions of years. Yet here I am - acceptable to the Living God - gay, polyamorous, and I will never be married.
I've often wondered how all those anti-gay preachers and other religious folk expect homosexuals to deal with heterosexual marriage. Would any of them want their mothers or sisters or daughters to get married to a man they know is gay? Do the women really want to get married to a man they know for damn sure doesn't find women (including her) attractive, or even sexually appealing? How does this work? They have a fat chance in hell in thinking that they can get homosexuals to abstain from having sex while the rest of the world is fucking and cock-sucking away. Fat chance! Especially with someone like me around encouraging men to kiss and rub each other's dicks and grab each other's asses. Fat fucking chance!
They say the anus is for waste - and it is, but so is the penis. You always hear them shouting, "the anus should not be used for pleasure or sex", but when it comes to the mouth, you don't hear a whisper or peep from them. For even the most stuck-up socially conservative preacher enjoys a good blow job. Most of us enjoy getting a blowjob or getting our clits licked and sucked - needless to say. If you refuse to be human, and follow those dehumanizing sex laws and encourage others to follow them as well, then you can't live in God's Garden - God won't have it, and God's people won't have it either. Those who do not go on to live in God's Garden will live in the grave.
God desires gentle lambs who enjoy the pastures that have been prepared for them - but if those lambs refuse to live as lambs and live unnaturally as wolves who consume other lambs, then they will be denied to eat continually from God's pastures. For it was not God who told them to live as wolves, but it was wolves who convinced lambs to become wolves. Some wolves have been so disastrously corrupted that they are no longer baby wolves, but have become full-grown wolves and will require wrath and death before even a single strand of white wool sprouts again.
Wednesday, October 19, 2016
The Rock of Offense - A Different Take
Any boulder that you tie around your neck or bind to your shoulders to appease whatever god it is you serve will be the rock that takes you down to the grave. God will personally pick up that boulder, with your neck still tightly bound, and toss into the deep dark sea - as is evident when looking at how God treated our ancestors. There is a standard to which you must abide: be decent human beings, treat others the way you want to be treated; be faithful children, trust in God's saving hand; and stay far away from any doctrine that takes away your humanity. This is God's only requirement, this is God's only rule and law. If you have any questions about being human and you don't want to consult with someone who knows God, then ask a baby. A babe will explain it to you plainly.
If you become a faithful babe, who trusts the saving hands of its Mother, you will find favor with the Living God, which will be evident in the transformations of your life and body, and your hope will be in life eternal.
It is important that we do not do harm to one another or to ourselves. If you are allergic to peanuts, do you still eat them? Of course not. Then you should not do what you know causes harm to your own body - your afflictions will start small and become ever-increasing evident. Be mindful! Pay heed! Beyond this, let no man tell you what to do with your own flesh. If you err with your flesh, God will not testify against your body, your body will testify against itself - and if you refuse to pay heed and cause your own undoing, you will get exactly what you deserve. Any mercy coming down from the God of light and darkness is totally at God's discretion.
If you want to die, open a religious book and believe the false doctrines it gives against being a plain old ordinary sexual human being. If you want to undergo decay, believe those false prophets who encourage churches to serve the mighty dollar. If you want to be rejected by God, believe those ministers who lie about God everyday, teaching you love the sacrifices made - as if God struggles with forgiving people. If God struggles with forgiveness (requiring the bloodshed of lambs and such), then we have no chance at being compassionate and merciful beings. God does not struggle with forgiveness, nor does God require sacrifices, nor does God demand that you give up your rent money, nor does God require you to believe the writings of men telling you to love restrictions and hate the naked body.
It is awful to think that God struggles with mercy. Creation was the ultimate act of mercy (we did nothing to deserve it). Did that too require the sacrifice of some lamb?
In thinking about false prophets - they do have those sweet words that they tell people. "Give me your mortgage payment and god will return your blessings ten fold." Fucking bullshit - to say the very least. I sometimes see those false prophets - you know the more popular ones who give out their prophecies that aren't only about money - and it is evident they are inspired by lying devils flying above. I once worried - but then I remembered 2 things, for one, the religious will perish whether they follow those prophets or not, and two, those prophets will perish. They will not be a burden to God for much longer.
How do you know if someone is a false prophet? Besides stating the obvious, they are nothing more than fortune tellers. There is no difference between the fortune teller who says "Jesus" and the fortune teller who says "spirit" and "the universe" - they will hand in hand walk toward the depths of the Earth. Whether or not they are saved thousands of years from now is, once again, totally at God's discretion. How do you know if someone is actually a prophet of the Living God? When they speak, whole countries are flooded with water. When they write, massive deserts are turned into gardens. When they move, their flesh is transformed right before your eyes.
If you become a faithful babe, who trusts the saving hands of its Mother, you will find favor with the Living God, which will be evident in the transformations of your life and body, and your hope will be in life eternal.
It is important that we do not do harm to one another or to ourselves. If you are allergic to peanuts, do you still eat them? Of course not. Then you should not do what you know causes harm to your own body - your afflictions will start small and become ever-increasing evident. Be mindful! Pay heed! Beyond this, let no man tell you what to do with your own flesh. If you err with your flesh, God will not testify against your body, your body will testify against itself - and if you refuse to pay heed and cause your own undoing, you will get exactly what you deserve. Any mercy coming down from the God of light and darkness is totally at God's discretion.
If you want to die, open a religious book and believe the false doctrines it gives against being a plain old ordinary sexual human being. If you want to undergo decay, believe those false prophets who encourage churches to serve the mighty dollar. If you want to be rejected by God, believe those ministers who lie about God everyday, teaching you love the sacrifices made - as if God struggles with forgiving people. If God struggles with forgiveness (requiring the bloodshed of lambs and such), then we have no chance at being compassionate and merciful beings. God does not struggle with forgiveness, nor does God require sacrifices, nor does God demand that you give up your rent money, nor does God require you to believe the writings of men telling you to love restrictions and hate the naked body.
It is awful to think that God struggles with mercy. Creation was the ultimate act of mercy (we did nothing to deserve it). Did that too require the sacrifice of some lamb?
In thinking about false prophets - they do have those sweet words that they tell people. "Give me your mortgage payment and god will return your blessings ten fold." Fucking bullshit - to say the very least. I sometimes see those false prophets - you know the more popular ones who give out their prophecies that aren't only about money - and it is evident they are inspired by lying devils flying above. I once worried - but then I remembered 2 things, for one, the religious will perish whether they follow those prophets or not, and two, those prophets will perish. They will not be a burden to God for much longer.
How do you know if someone is a false prophet? Besides stating the obvious, they are nothing more than fortune tellers. There is no difference between the fortune teller who says "Jesus" and the fortune teller who says "spirit" and "the universe" - they will hand in hand walk toward the depths of the Earth. Whether or not they are saved thousands of years from now is, once again, totally at God's discretion. How do you know if someone is actually a prophet of the Living God? When they speak, whole countries are flooded with water. When they write, massive deserts are turned into gardens. When they move, their flesh is transformed right before your eyes.
Sunday, October 2, 2016
God against religion
I was brought up in the filth of the Pentecostal Church by people who were brought up in the filth of the Church. But in my mid-20s, I rejected religion and cleaned my mouth, and purged my mind as best as I knew how. Then a year later, the God I did not know called out to me. Then this is what was said concerning me: "Is this not a brand plucked from the fire? Remove the filthy garments from him." And again, "See, I have taken your iniquity away from you and will clothe you with festal robes."
I am not a smart man, at least, not according to my own standards. I am, what I would consider, a jack of many trades, but a master of none. For instance, I am a cook, but I am no chef; I am a wine-maker, but I am no connoisseur. I know a bit of this, and a little of that - but there is so much to know and learn - it becomes overwhelming. And often, when I am satisfied with knowing little of a certain subject, I am satisfied and I move on to something new. I have not been one to put all of my attention and dedication into a single thing - with a very few notable exceptions. I am OK with this, and God has been OK with this. How do I know that God has been OK with this? For 2 reasons, because God has not brought against me any objections in the matter and because it has worked out well for me.
I am convinced that the more we know, the more we don't know. I have not met face-to-face with a man or woman who looked for God in the land of the living. They are satisfied with believing that they will know God and know why God does what God does when they are dead. This line of thinking did not satisfy me, nor did it resonate with me. Remember, I am Jack - I prefer to know a little of something than nothing at all. Opinions and beliefs are the equivalent of not knowing at all - so this is also unsatisfactory. I would rather know a little than know nothing at all. This character trait was acceptable to God, and because I inquired of God to know a little, God revealed much. I lack nothing from God.
With regard to those few notable exceptions, if God has a particular task for me, then I become dedicated to said task. For instance, God is about to put an end to both religion and faithlessness on this planet. When God raised up Brent from the dead, and then me, God made it clear to the world that God is fed up with the murdering, the plundering, the oppressing, the idolatry, the slandering, the denigrating, and the godless faithlessness that pervades humanity from generation after generation. Why is God fed up with all this now, rather than say, a thousand years ago? For one, people are in a better position to accept the obvious - the same can not be said a thousand years ago when there weren't many people who would be willing to put scientific facts above beliefs. If God came a thousand years ago, then God would have had to wipe out the entire human race, as there would be no people or groups of people who would understand what God was doing. Rather, God will come in this generation, among those who have beliefs and know that their beliefs are nothing more than beliefs. It is probable that God will level a few cities and countries, and it will be obvious to many what God is doing. God is going to make it abundantly clear that God is the God of the living, in the land of the living, and not the dead. And if people still feel the need to pick up guns and machetes after the fact, then those nations will be dealt with accordingly.
People know what is good - it is why they feel bad when they do wrong. They see the error in their flesh, but they make no haste in correcting their issue. The nations err and err again, making excuses for their many bad dealings, all the while having heart palpitations for year after year. But the day is coming when all their bad behavior catches up to them, and they will have the first signs of heart disease. Their feet will swell as they keep murdering, while calling it 'justice'. Angina will set in as they keep oppressing the poor and those who do not act like them. Their chest will tighten as they keep offering up religion and lip service to God. There will be no doctors to help them with the pain, nor will they remove the fat and excess meat from their diet to remedy the problem. So finally, at long last, they will clench their chest in agonizing pain as their heart dies within them.
Yahweh said to me, "They will hear, but they will not understand."
Monday, September 26, 2016
Jill Stein may have my vote
I am very unsettled by the debate between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton - I am unsettled and upset by their motivations. It will do no good, in the long term, to vote for either of them.
Neither of them get to the deep issues that put a choke hold on the land. For instance, violence among black youth - they both agree, the solution is take away guns and militarize the police. The only true solution is simple - but it reaches down to the depth of woes that have plagued blacks in America for centuries - and that is systemic racism and oppression. To provide restorative justice is to end hatred among our youth. Young black men are not violent because they are black - but because they were born in oppression, ghettos, and slums (because their parents were, and their parents' parents were, all the way back to when they were freed from bondage) - and they are rarely offered a way out. Give them peace, and they just might become peaceful. Can't the same be said about your children?
But humanity has been foolish and so very disappointing. They only need to look at themselves and ask, "Why have they been so violent in their generations?" and "What have I been given that they have been denied?" These are simple questions - and if they are answered appropriately and honestly, and not with malice or deceit, they will come to a sound conclusion. Justice!
I am unsettled because I am convinced there will be more mass drone killings, both inside and outside the US; because there will be violent persecutions of those who cry out against injustice; and because of the devastation that will be done to our planet.
I do intend to vote this election for Jill Stein - because she is an idealist of sorts - and I truly appreciate many of her non-violent bright-eyed ideas. I appreciate her wanting to eliminate student debt (which is the only way I was able to go to school to become a software developer, as neither of my parents could have afforded to send me, being born in oppression and all), and I appreciate her wanting to provide free college education for any American who wants it. I appreciate her desire to end ALL drone attacks and taking 50% of the budget away from the Department of Defense to assist in restorative justice - not just among blacks, but among the poor, as her ultimate goal is to end poverty in the United States. I truly appreciate her child-like bright-eyed ideas.
Unfortunately, America does not want Jill, nor does America want anyone like Jill. They will reject her to her face by voting in someone like Trump or Clinton. They will get the violence they vote for.
Thursday, September 15, 2016
Hebrew Idols
Every Hebrew (Jewish) scripture was filtered through the human mind and written down by human hands. For a person to say that those writings are the word of God would mean that the human mind is the source of God's word - to look at things simply. The fact that you cannot separate your god from your scriptures is proof enough that your god is only an idol - a figment and creation of your own mental processes. You read, you hear, you build. If the beginning and end of your god is bound by letters in a book, and not by any evident power, you may as well bow to a glass bottle and say to that thing, "you have made all".
It is evident that God has abandoned you to your worship of whatever is in your mind today. It matters not if that thing was something you were raised with, or something you picked up out of persuasive words from others - you serve an idol.
Inspiration from God can certainly be found among the prophets in the Hebrew and Christian scriptures - there are many pearls there buried under piles and piles of bullshit. But you savor the pearls and the shit equally, and say "it is all holy". What are the pearls? All those verses that tell you to be decent human beings; to treat people the way you'd want a stranger to treat your mother; to seek the Living God; to trust God's saving hand. What is the bullshit? All those verses that tell you to kill, rape, enslave and plunder because "god" said so; to believe that hail only falls on the unjust; to love wealth and excess; to think that you have any control whatsoever over the salvation of mankind (including yourself).
Do not think for a second that Yahweh God would ever come to your rescue, not even your children will receive an ounce of compassion from the Living God. For God to endorse a person like you would be the equivalent of God endorsing all your lies and cruel beliefs.
The salvation of God is eternal life - to be saved from death and the grave. If you think that the Living God told Elisha to instruct Jehu to kill off the men and children who loved Ahab to avenge the death of prophets, you are greatly mistaken. God has abandoned you to such foolishness. Even Hosea, a decent human being, understood that if God wanted those people wiped out, then God would have no problem taking care of God's own business. It would have been effortless for God to direct a few poisonous snakes in the direction of those people and take care of God's problem. But, like Jehu, you do not believe God, nor do you believe in God's power. If I say that God's power and word rests in the wisdom and might of men - you'll verbally and mentally disagree - but your heart contradicts you and is telling you volumes about your faithlessness. You do not trust God, and God does not trust you.
This is not meant as an attack, but as a statement of truth. I am only bringing to light what you keep in darkness.
Hosea 1:4: And Yahweh said to him (Hosea), “Name him Jezreel; for yet a little while, and I will punish the house of Jehu for the bloodshed of Jezreel, and I will put an end to the kingdom of the house of Israel.
Did Hosea think that God was telling him to start murdering Jews who supported the acts of Elijah, Elisha, and Jehu? Of course not. Hosea knew God's power - but you do not. He knew that God takes care of God's own business, but you must pick up hammer, chisel, and sword to fulfill the works of that thing you serve.
I am convinced that the only reason there are Hebrew scriptures in almost every home in America, instead of in some deep dark cave waiting to be discovered, is because of those decent people like Hosea who knew the Living God. Hosea received God's mercy (and was made a prophet) because he believed God, and because he believed God's wondrous and strange power - his faithfulness was credited to him as righteousness.
The truth of the matter is that those who know God never have to fight - not with hands or words (and certainly not with swords). It is never required of us, nor should it be desired. Why fight over something that God has full control over? If God wants a tree chopped down, then God will ensure that said tree is chopped down - God does not need to let you know that a tree needs to be chopped down. God will simply make sure that it happens. You knowing the tree's beginning from its end makes absolutely no difference in the matter.
Tuesday, July 26, 2016
Belief and Faith
It was not through magic that the universe was formed, and it is not through magic that the righteous live eternal.
Our ancestors did not know what is true and what is a lie concerning the Living God - their unconscious slumber is a testimony of this. They did not know God nor did they believe God. Those people had many beliefs, and their faiths were founded on books and writings and sayings, and not on God's power. This faithlessness led to sin (bad deeds), and therefore, they perished.
It was a sad thing that happened to the early church. The faith of the church was initially founded on God's power through Christ's resurrection, but, for many reasons, they stopped seeking God and they put their faith in words and scriptures - even as the church does to this very day. Their scriptures are filled with a little right and a lot of wrong - and they based their faith on these things and not on the simplicity found in God. This faithlessness led to sin, and they perished.
My faith was not founded on Christ's resurrection (being so very long ago), but on God's power through other means. Christ said a single statement to me, and I understood him. I only had to walk to God's door and knock. God opened the door, gave me the key, and let me go in and out as often as I pleased.
For a man or woman to be acceptable to the Living God, they must be faithful - they must have a childlike faith. To define faith, I'll use the example of a baby - since true faith can be easily seen in babies who have no desire to be anything other than human beings. Babies trust the protecting arms of their mothers, they never ever question this. They never begin to doubt and ask themselves, "Will my mother toss me into a pit of fire?" This is the type of trust that God seeks in mankind. If it is not found, then they will go on toward the grave.
Israel was faithless, full of faithless people. They put their trust in writings and sayings and laws, never heeding the words of the prophets who told them to trust God and do good. So God rejected them, even as their own scriptures testify. No law has ever saved a man's life - salvation has only come through faith in God - believing and trusting God. This isn't to say that the law has no merit, it certainly does - especially if you find yourself constantly doing what you know is wrong (and no merit beyond that). But the faithful are not bound by the letter of the law because the Law of God is written within them, and their righteousness allows them liberty under God.
The church is also faithless, full of faithless people. This church is not what Christ worked for, nor is it what he gave up his life for. When I say, "gave up his life", I mean that at any time, he could have abandoned his work - he had the liberty to do so. But he chose to be a living testimony against the ignorance and bad deeds of mankind because he knew that God was going to save him from death and raise him back up. He trusted the arms of his Father. As a result, people found God through him and his salvation.
Faith in God is not a feeling - much like a child trusting the arms of his mother surpasses a simple feeling. Belief is feeling, true faith is not. Faith is trust, and the more a child sees his mother caring for him and protecting him, the more he trusts her saving hand; he will expect it from her and will not see it any other way.
Our ancestors did not know what is true and what is a lie concerning the Living God - their unconscious slumber is a testimony of this. They did not know God nor did they believe God. Those people had many beliefs, and their faiths were founded on books and writings and sayings, and not on God's power. This faithlessness led to sin (bad deeds), and therefore, they perished.
It was a sad thing that happened to the early church. The faith of the church was initially founded on God's power through Christ's resurrection, but, for many reasons, they stopped seeking God and they put their faith in words and scriptures - even as the church does to this very day. Their scriptures are filled with a little right and a lot of wrong - and they based their faith on these things and not on the simplicity found in God. This faithlessness led to sin, and they perished.
My faith was not founded on Christ's resurrection (being so very long ago), but on God's power through other means. Christ said a single statement to me, and I understood him. I only had to walk to God's door and knock. God opened the door, gave me the key, and let me go in and out as often as I pleased.
For a man or woman to be acceptable to the Living God, they must be faithful - they must have a childlike faith. To define faith, I'll use the example of a baby - since true faith can be easily seen in babies who have no desire to be anything other than human beings. Babies trust the protecting arms of their mothers, they never ever question this. They never begin to doubt and ask themselves, "Will my mother toss me into a pit of fire?" This is the type of trust that God seeks in mankind. If it is not found, then they will go on toward the grave.
Israel was faithless, full of faithless people. They put their trust in writings and sayings and laws, never heeding the words of the prophets who told them to trust God and do good. So God rejected them, even as their own scriptures testify. No law has ever saved a man's life - salvation has only come through faith in God - believing and trusting God. This isn't to say that the law has no merit, it certainly does - especially if you find yourself constantly doing what you know is wrong (and no merit beyond that). But the faithful are not bound by the letter of the law because the Law of God is written within them, and their righteousness allows them liberty under God.
The church is also faithless, full of faithless people. This church is not what Christ worked for, nor is it what he gave up his life for. When I say, "gave up his life", I mean that at any time, he could have abandoned his work - he had the liberty to do so. But he chose to be a living testimony against the ignorance and bad deeds of mankind because he knew that God was going to save him from death and raise him back up. He trusted the arms of his Father. As a result, people found God through him and his salvation.
Faith in God is not a feeling - much like a child trusting the arms of his mother surpasses a simple feeling. Belief is feeling, true faith is not. Faith is trust, and the more a child sees his mother caring for him and protecting him, the more he trusts her saving hand; he will expect it from her and will not see it any other way.
Monday, July 11, 2016
Capitalism and Black Violence
The only way to end both cop-on-black crime and black-on-black crime is to put a complete end to capitalism. Capitalism (that dog-eat-dog/lion-eat-gazelle system) ensures that there will always be the impoverished poor among us (as they have their ideal rate of unemployment, enforcing slums in the midst of mansions). The poor, by default, will be the black folk in America - simply because when our ancestors came out of slavery, most of them walked out empty handed - perpetuating poverty generation after generation (due to lack of quality education, skill, and money - and not receiving enough help from the government that so graciously 'set us free').
The only answer is justice. Justice will end police brutality and it will end black crime. Justice can immediately come by spending a few less billion on violent wars and more on correcting the morale of people (through government-sponsored higher education and by providing money and well-kept/structured homes) and by fixing the infrastructures of other nations devastated by the violence and oppression caused by the US government (both present and past). Justice will only be long-lasting when we have democracy in the workplace, so that no one will acquire huge excesses of money (making millions of dollars each and every year). Such wealth is unnecessary and has damaged both the lives and minds of many black people in America.
To those in power: Make right what was made wrong so long ago! If you want to do good, get to the root of the problem. Stop throwing black men in jail to spare your fat wallet. Stop protecting wealth in the hands of the few - it is uncalled for and does far more harm than good. You will see this in a short while when you experience a debilitating crash and fall from which you cannot lift yourself. You will be hurled head-long, and there will be no one strong enough to help you back on your feet. Stop the bullshit and stop the lies. Tell the truth to yourselves.
The only answer is justice. Justice will end police brutality and it will end black crime. Justice can immediately come by spending a few less billion on violent wars and more on correcting the morale of people (through government-sponsored higher education and by providing money and well-kept/structured homes) and by fixing the infrastructures of other nations devastated by the violence and oppression caused by the US government (both present and past). Justice will only be long-lasting when we have democracy in the workplace, so that no one will acquire huge excesses of money (making millions of dollars each and every year). Such wealth is unnecessary and has damaged both the lives and minds of many black people in America.
To those in power: Make right what was made wrong so long ago! If you want to do good, get to the root of the problem. Stop throwing black men in jail to spare your fat wallet. Stop protecting wealth in the hands of the few - it is uncalled for and does far more harm than good. You will see this in a short while when you experience a debilitating crash and fall from which you cannot lift yourself. You will be hurled head-long, and there will be no one strong enough to help you back on your feet. Stop the bullshit and stop the lies. Tell the truth to yourselves.
Sunday, July 10, 2016
Killer Robots
When my ancestors came out of their dungeons, which was slavery, they were given the bad hand. Because of their brutal oppression, and lack of skill and education, they and their children were destined for many failures. Many problems among black Americans are both the result of perpetual oppression (in and out of the home) and the denial of immediate justice - redeeming justice - plain old ordinary justice - just to make right what was made wrong. Violence was the inevitable outcome for many young black men, as many of them were raised in oppression because their parents and their parent's parents were raised in oppression.
The recent killing in Dallas after the guy shot those cops resulted in the cops sending in a robot to blow the man up. They (not the military, but the police) used a drone to kill someone. This is extremely concerning, because if cops can justify using a robot to blow up that man whom they were afraid of, what then becomes their limitation in the future? It is not surprising that this occurred in this country, but it is concerning nonetheless.
I have no doubt that more robots of this type will be manufactured by the thousands soon enough - no doubt at all. They have already been approved by the justice system and are already taking the place of policemen in the streets, as we have seen in Dallas. Instead of figuring out ways to provide work, food, clean homes, and education to the oppressed people in this country, they develop new means of killing them when they get out of line (reacting to their enforced oppression). How fucking infuriating that they choose the violent cheaper options rather than the good and just options.
Perhaps there should be a drought in this place - shutting up the rain for 3 months - covering the entire eastern coast of the US.
I'll post this dream that I had on March 30, 2008. The dream was so profound and vivid that I had to write it down. It was given to me toward the end of the period that I actually received dreams from God. I considered it the distant future of America - but as I've seen in Dallas, Texas - it may not actually be so distant after all. Be mindful, I wrote the dream from my point of view, watching the events as they took place.
It was dusk, and many people were outside running around screaming - everyone was shot dead. The guns that shot those people were not held by other people, they were automated guns - and I immediately knew that those people were all out past curfew. The next day came, and all the bodies were gone. Dusk came again and the same thing happened with the people out past curfew and they too were shot dead. Some people figured out how to fool the guns by acting like they were shot dead, and were not targeted by the rounds coming from the guns. Those people would lie on the ground and some how get up later when it was dark.
(At this point, I'm now part of the dream) The next day, dusk came again and everyone was getting shot, so I laid on the ground with two women and a little girl. Somehow the feds caught on that people were doing this and were able to knock us all out (probably with an automated gas attack), so we all fell asleep. We woke up in a room that looked like an old small factory - I knew that the government caught us and I thought we were about to get beat. We were there with a few other men and women who were also caught. A federal officer came in, without a smile, and walked up to us with this container of white powder in his hand. He made us dip our right index fingers in the white powder - if the white powder stuck to our finger, it meant we were born in an elite crowd and didn't have to die for being out past curfew (I didn't fully understand this). It stuck to all of our fingers, however the little girl was first sprayed on the hand with this clear oily liquid so the officer could see what color it would change to - then after the liquid made no color change, her hand was dried and he dipped her finger in the powder and it stuck.
A new officer arrived and immediately began escorting us out of the facility, which was not guarded very well. I first went to use the bathroom, so when I came out, no one was around. I exited the building and saw one of the guys I was with walking around the corner, so I ran and attempted to follow him, however I lost him again. There was an old gate that surrounded the building - it had human sized hole in it that I figured everyone went through. Before I walked off of the facility grounds, I looked up to see if there were any 'warning messengers' from Yahweh, there were none, so I went through the gate and walked up the road. I came to an intersection where there were no street lights, I looked to my right and saw no one - then I looked to my left and saw that the people I was with were going inside of a house. So I ran up to the house, and the officer hit me in my side with a baton he was holding and asked me why I was late - I told him "I had to pee". So we all went in the house, walked up the stairs, and entered the living room of a very beautiful home. We were told that it was where we would be living from now on - and no one had a problem with this but me, because I knew that we had practically become slaves and there was no more democracy.
The officer began explaining to us many things about the house, such as how the house was intelligent and monitored everything we did. He told us that in normal homes, when you walk through any door, a sound is made if you were wearing clothes that were inappropriate. He then looked at me and told me that my clothes were not appropriate, so I asked him why the door had made no sound, he told me that the options in that house - because of our status - allowed for the system to be silenced. He then directed our attention to the television, and it showed me walking through the door, but I looked like a beast of sorts wearing my same clothes (I don't remember what I was wearing - but it was nothing out of the ordinary). I took the odd appearance to mean that I shouldn't be wearing those clothes because they were against the law.
Afterwards, the TV began to show everyone's possible future actions while in the house - some of the guys were gay, and they were having sex, the girls were partying and dancing, even people nude in the jacuzzi - everyone was having a great time in the house; but it didn't show me at all except when I had first walked through the door. So I asked the officer how the house could predict the future. He then turned the TV station to show me.
The TV showed the manufacturing of these super intelligent computers, but they were the size of a ball point pen. Those little rods were black and had a multi-colored word on them - the multi-colored word on the rod/supercomputer began with an 'A' (I don't remember what it was). The TV showed these things being manufactured by the millions, and it said that they are in every home and business to monitor everyone's actions, report illegal activity, and kill when necessary. The person on the TV talking about the rod said that it could even tell when someone was trying to disable it by showing a guy trying to break the rod by bending it, he was shocked by the rod and killed. Then it showed a child playing the rod, and the child was not harmed because the rod knew that the child was simply playing.
After I saw these things, I was so mind-numbingly furious that I went into a raging protest. I was so infuriated that I dared any gun to ever shoot at me. So I speedily walked past everyone, including the officer, went outside where it was almost pitch dark, and began to sing as loudly as I could so everyone in every nearby home could hear me. I sung something on the lines of "Yahweh will destroy those rods, each and every one of them. He will bring down these houses. He will bring this government to nothing, and the oppressed will be set free."
Then I woke up.
The recent killing in Dallas after the guy shot those cops resulted in the cops sending in a robot to blow the man up. They (not the military, but the police) used a drone to kill someone. This is extremely concerning, because if cops can justify using a robot to blow up that man whom they were afraid of, what then becomes their limitation in the future? It is not surprising that this occurred in this country, but it is concerning nonetheless.
I have no doubt that more robots of this type will be manufactured by the thousands soon enough - no doubt at all. They have already been approved by the justice system and are already taking the place of policemen in the streets, as we have seen in Dallas. Instead of figuring out ways to provide work, food, clean homes, and education to the oppressed people in this country, they develop new means of killing them when they get out of line (reacting to their enforced oppression). How fucking infuriating that they choose the violent cheaper options rather than the good and just options.
Perhaps there should be a drought in this place - shutting up the rain for 3 months - covering the entire eastern coast of the US.
I'll post this dream that I had on March 30, 2008. The dream was so profound and vivid that I had to write it down. It was given to me toward the end of the period that I actually received dreams from God. I considered it the distant future of America - but as I've seen in Dallas, Texas - it may not actually be so distant after all. Be mindful, I wrote the dream from my point of view, watching the events as they took place.
It was dusk, and many people were outside running around screaming - everyone was shot dead. The guns that shot those people were not held by other people, they were automated guns - and I immediately knew that those people were all out past curfew. The next day came, and all the bodies were gone. Dusk came again and the same thing happened with the people out past curfew and they too were shot dead. Some people figured out how to fool the guns by acting like they were shot dead, and were not targeted by the rounds coming from the guns. Those people would lie on the ground and some how get up later when it was dark.
(At this point, I'm now part of the dream) The next day, dusk came again and everyone was getting shot, so I laid on the ground with two women and a little girl. Somehow the feds caught on that people were doing this and were able to knock us all out (probably with an automated gas attack), so we all fell asleep. We woke up in a room that looked like an old small factory - I knew that the government caught us and I thought we were about to get beat. We were there with a few other men and women who were also caught. A federal officer came in, without a smile, and walked up to us with this container of white powder in his hand. He made us dip our right index fingers in the white powder - if the white powder stuck to our finger, it meant we were born in an elite crowd and didn't have to die for being out past curfew (I didn't fully understand this). It stuck to all of our fingers, however the little girl was first sprayed on the hand with this clear oily liquid so the officer could see what color it would change to - then after the liquid made no color change, her hand was dried and he dipped her finger in the powder and it stuck.
A new officer arrived and immediately began escorting us out of the facility, which was not guarded very well. I first went to use the bathroom, so when I came out, no one was around. I exited the building and saw one of the guys I was with walking around the corner, so I ran and attempted to follow him, however I lost him again. There was an old gate that surrounded the building - it had human sized hole in it that I figured everyone went through. Before I walked off of the facility grounds, I looked up to see if there were any 'warning messengers' from Yahweh, there were none, so I went through the gate and walked up the road. I came to an intersection where there were no street lights, I looked to my right and saw no one - then I looked to my left and saw that the people I was with were going inside of a house. So I ran up to the house, and the officer hit me in my side with a baton he was holding and asked me why I was late - I told him "I had to pee". So we all went in the house, walked up the stairs, and entered the living room of a very beautiful home. We were told that it was where we would be living from now on - and no one had a problem with this but me, because I knew that we had practically become slaves and there was no more democracy.
The officer began explaining to us many things about the house, such as how the house was intelligent and monitored everything we did. He told us that in normal homes, when you walk through any door, a sound is made if you were wearing clothes that were inappropriate. He then looked at me and told me that my clothes were not appropriate, so I asked him why the door had made no sound, he told me that the options in that house - because of our status - allowed for the system to be silenced. He then directed our attention to the television, and it showed me walking through the door, but I looked like a beast of sorts wearing my same clothes (I don't remember what I was wearing - but it was nothing out of the ordinary). I took the odd appearance to mean that I shouldn't be wearing those clothes because they were against the law.
Afterwards, the TV began to show everyone's possible future actions while in the house - some of the guys were gay, and they were having sex, the girls were partying and dancing, even people nude in the jacuzzi - everyone was having a great time in the house; but it didn't show me at all except when I had first walked through the door. So I asked the officer how the house could predict the future. He then turned the TV station to show me.
The TV showed the manufacturing of these super intelligent computers, but they were the size of a ball point pen. Those little rods were black and had a multi-colored word on them - the multi-colored word on the rod/supercomputer began with an 'A' (I don't remember what it was). The TV showed these things being manufactured by the millions, and it said that they are in every home and business to monitor everyone's actions, report illegal activity, and kill when necessary. The person on the TV talking about the rod said that it could even tell when someone was trying to disable it by showing a guy trying to break the rod by bending it, he was shocked by the rod and killed. Then it showed a child playing the rod, and the child was not harmed because the rod knew that the child was simply playing.
After I saw these things, I was so mind-numbingly furious that I went into a raging protest. I was so infuriated that I dared any gun to ever shoot at me. So I speedily walked past everyone, including the officer, went outside where it was almost pitch dark, and began to sing as loudly as I could so everyone in every nearby home could hear me. I sung something on the lines of "Yahweh will destroy those rods, each and every one of them. He will bring down these houses. He will bring this government to nothing, and the oppressed will be set free."
Then I woke up.
Friday, July 1, 2016
Too Much
There is too much unnecessary evil in the world - evil being simply defined as treating people in ways you would never want to be treated.
Kind acts in this world often come with a price tag. People often expect you to pay them back for their kindness in some form or another; this is the opposite of Godliness. They'll say, "Remember when I..." or "Don't forget that I..." as if kind deeds are less important than the costs they incur. I should expect this sort of thing as people suffer, offering up a thousand prayers to whichever 'one and true god' they pray to, while constantly sighing in their soul, "Woe is me!".
It is because of God that you suffer. It is because of the costs of your kindness that God has abandoned you and your children - children who learn this quasi-kindness from you. The only true sin is faithlessness. The children of faithlessness are carelessness, murder, abuse, quasi-kindness, violence, greed, reviling, thievery, sexual immorality (treating people like garbage because of how they look), idolatry (refusing to believe what you see someone doing - especially God, and believing something else altogether), and any other act you would never want someone to do to you. A faithful person overcomes these things, even with time.
A faithful person watches God and is transformed in the flesh. The faithful woman who was once deaf will hear God in the land of the living; the faithful man who was once blind will see God while still breathing in the flesh; the child who was once disfigured will stand structured before God as those around them watch their bones, eyes, and muscles grow, straighten and strengthen. The kind acts of the marvelous God are humbling to the faithful. What can you give to God as payment for God's kindness? You can only do what is good for the world; you can only be faithful; this is the only way to glorify God.
If God were hungry, would God tell you? If God were thirsty, would God command you to fetch water? If God needed worship, would God step out of the Garden to inform you? God has been taking care of God for longer than you or I could imagine - you are not required to handle God's business. And if you have insulted, struck or killed a man because you believe you are doing God some sort of favor, you are greatly mistaken - you have proven to yourself that what you worship is nothing more than an idol you constructed in your imagination. You have been faithless, and this has been too much for you, your children, and the world to bear.
A faithful person will seek goodness within themselves. They will desire to create changes within themselves to be more like the God that has been showering them with compassion and restfulness. If your hope is in a book, then you have stumbled across a sad thing. A book can be doubted and thrown in the trash, and if this can happen to your holy book, then what is your faith? A faith that can be easily tossed in the trash is a worthless thing, it is an abomination. It is for this reason that our ancestors endured awful tragedies and have perished, along with the beasts and other animals. The righteousness of God, the word of God made flesh - which are God's faithful people - do not perish. They have been given the promise, the promise of an abundant and everlasting life. In no manner does God require perfection from imperfection (imperfect flesh), but God does require goodness and for us to perpetually seek what is true.
A man who seeks what is true asks himself, "Why do so many millions of brown-skinned children go hungry?" Upon seeking, he will discover that there is more than enough food for everyone. He will then discover that greed and capitalism has conquered this world, turning our garden into a desert for impoverished children to fight, sometimes with violence and treachery, for the items they need to survive. He will discover that people are paid to work to the bone to provide food that is freely given to millions of livestock, but to gruesomely withhold it from millions of brown-skinned kids all because they have little or no money. The greedy then justify their actions by saying, "It's a dog eat dog world", never speaking the more obvious truth that it's a "lion eats gazelle world". The man who seeks, and has become faithful, will then say to himself, "It is not my job to figure out how to get rid of lions, or how to separate the lions from the gazelles, but to figure out ways to end the systems of oppression which create lions and gazelles so that all may live in relative peace and harmony."
Kind acts in this world often come with a price tag. People often expect you to pay them back for their kindness in some form or another; this is the opposite of Godliness. They'll say, "Remember when I..." or "Don't forget that I..." as if kind deeds are less important than the costs they incur. I should expect this sort of thing as people suffer, offering up a thousand prayers to whichever 'one and true god' they pray to, while constantly sighing in their soul, "Woe is me!".
It is because of God that you suffer. It is because of the costs of your kindness that God has abandoned you and your children - children who learn this quasi-kindness from you. The only true sin is faithlessness. The children of faithlessness are carelessness, murder, abuse, quasi-kindness, violence, greed, reviling, thievery, sexual immorality (treating people like garbage because of how they look), idolatry (refusing to believe what you see someone doing - especially God, and believing something else altogether), and any other act you would never want someone to do to you. A faithful person overcomes these things, even with time.
A faithful person watches God and is transformed in the flesh. The faithful woman who was once deaf will hear God in the land of the living; the faithful man who was once blind will see God while still breathing in the flesh; the child who was once disfigured will stand structured before God as those around them watch their bones, eyes, and muscles grow, straighten and strengthen. The kind acts of the marvelous God are humbling to the faithful. What can you give to God as payment for God's kindness? You can only do what is good for the world; you can only be faithful; this is the only way to glorify God.
If God were hungry, would God tell you? If God were thirsty, would God command you to fetch water? If God needed worship, would God step out of the Garden to inform you? God has been taking care of God for longer than you or I could imagine - you are not required to handle God's business. And if you have insulted, struck or killed a man because you believe you are doing God some sort of favor, you are greatly mistaken - you have proven to yourself that what you worship is nothing more than an idol you constructed in your imagination. You have been faithless, and this has been too much for you, your children, and the world to bear.
A faithful person will seek goodness within themselves. They will desire to create changes within themselves to be more like the God that has been showering them with compassion and restfulness. If your hope is in a book, then you have stumbled across a sad thing. A book can be doubted and thrown in the trash, and if this can happen to your holy book, then what is your faith? A faith that can be easily tossed in the trash is a worthless thing, it is an abomination. It is for this reason that our ancestors endured awful tragedies and have perished, along with the beasts and other animals. The righteousness of God, the word of God made flesh - which are God's faithful people - do not perish. They have been given the promise, the promise of an abundant and everlasting life. In no manner does God require perfection from imperfection (imperfect flesh), but God does require goodness and for us to perpetually seek what is true.
A man who seeks what is true asks himself, "Why do so many millions of brown-skinned children go hungry?" Upon seeking, he will discover that there is more than enough food for everyone. He will then discover that greed and capitalism has conquered this world, turning our garden into a desert for impoverished children to fight, sometimes with violence and treachery, for the items they need to survive. He will discover that people are paid to work to the bone to provide food that is freely given to millions of livestock, but to gruesomely withhold it from millions of brown-skinned kids all because they have little or no money. The greedy then justify their actions by saying, "It's a dog eat dog world", never speaking the more obvious truth that it's a "lion eats gazelle world". The man who seeks, and has become faithful, will then say to himself, "It is not my job to figure out how to get rid of lions, or how to separate the lions from the gazelles, but to figure out ways to end the systems of oppression which create lions and gazelles so that all may live in relative peace and harmony."
Friday, June 24, 2016
Life Eternal (An Introductory Part)
Ever since I first began walking with God, I was sure to assume nothing about God. I had long since stopped listening to people's talk about our Maker, as if they knew the difference between truth and belief - even though their aggressive stand is that they are one and the same. So in the beginning, I thought that it was our place to do good, change the world into a beautiful home for all generations, and then rest unconsciously with our ancestors forever. I had no thoughts whatsoever concerning an afterlife - it just didn't fit with life and all that God was showing me. Why all the due-diligence with good work in this world if there is some other eternal world that our ghosts are going to live in after we're dead - it just didn't fit, so I didn't even consider it. But then God corrected my error and said to me, "Even when you are struck down, and your life is taken from you, I will quickly give it back and raise you up, flesh and all, to life eternal." It was an "Ohhhhhh!!!" moment; it all made sense in an amazing and humbling way.
Perhaps you should consider your god. The fact that your god does nothing more, or anything different in life, than any other god should really tell you something. The fact that your god promises nothing in life should tell you a great deal about what it is you worship. The fact that you must construct your god in your mind from words of men and holy books, should be bothersome to you. If your hands do all the work that your god refuses to do, a light bulb should pop up in your head. If you have to strap a bomb to your chest because he won't lift a finger in your defense, perhaps you should reconsider. Your ancestors, who've worship any number gods throughout the generations, were left to suffer and rot in some God-forsaken grave forever - they and their children. Your worship of "the one and true god" has provided no different outcome than your ancestors who worshiped some other "one and true god". Not one of your songs, dances, chants, shouts, sacrifices, meditations, charities, sufferings, baptisms, nor explosions have moved your god a single bit - does this tell you anything?
Seek the Living God so that you may live. Shut up your songs, and let good flow from you like an ever-flowing stream. Be no man's doorstep, but be an overcomer. Do good so that you may live.
What has violence proven in our world other than that it produces more violence? It has been said that we should heap kindness on the heads of those that do us wrong, and I would partly agree. I fully agree that we should not return blow for blow, but that when we are struck, we should go our own way in peace. You will look on with your eyes, and you will watch the wicked perish. Their eyes will not see God's habitation. I walked with a low head out of the dungeon of our exile, being so long kept away from God's heart, and I walked into a place that is not easily described. I have seen things that no other men on this planet have seen; and I have experience pangs that no other women have experienced, as our world is crushed under a load of wealth and brutality. But our goal could be common, if you only put aside your bad behavior and the thought of bloodshed, and seek the face of the Living God so that you might become a faithful kid; a kid who will become unafraid of the arrows that fly by day, and of the pestilence that stalks by night.
God's habitation - the life and garden for lovers - the Garden of God Eternal. I am gay, I have enjoyed the male physique for as long as I can remember. To walk naked in God's Eternal Garden is my rest.
Perhaps you should consider your god. The fact that your god does nothing more, or anything different in life, than any other god should really tell you something. The fact that your god promises nothing in life should tell you a great deal about what it is you worship. The fact that you must construct your god in your mind from words of men and holy books, should be bothersome to you. If your hands do all the work that your god refuses to do, a light bulb should pop up in your head. If you have to strap a bomb to your chest because he won't lift a finger in your defense, perhaps you should reconsider. Your ancestors, who've worship any number gods throughout the generations, were left to suffer and rot in some God-forsaken grave forever - they and their children. Your worship of "the one and true god" has provided no different outcome than your ancestors who worshiped some other "one and true god". Not one of your songs, dances, chants, shouts, sacrifices, meditations, charities, sufferings, baptisms, nor explosions have moved your god a single bit - does this tell you anything?
Seek the Living God so that you may live. Shut up your songs, and let good flow from you like an ever-flowing stream. Be no man's doorstep, but be an overcomer. Do good so that you may live.
What has violence proven in our world other than that it produces more violence? It has been said that we should heap kindness on the heads of those that do us wrong, and I would partly agree. I fully agree that we should not return blow for blow, but that when we are struck, we should go our own way in peace. You will look on with your eyes, and you will watch the wicked perish. Their eyes will not see God's habitation. I walked with a low head out of the dungeon of our exile, being so long kept away from God's heart, and I walked into a place that is not easily described. I have seen things that no other men on this planet have seen; and I have experience pangs that no other women have experienced, as our world is crushed under a load of wealth and brutality. But our goal could be common, if you only put aside your bad behavior and the thought of bloodshed, and seek the face of the Living God so that you might become a faithful kid; a kid who will become unafraid of the arrows that fly by day, and of the pestilence that stalks by night.
God's habitation - the life and garden for lovers - the Garden of God Eternal. I am gay, I have enjoyed the male physique for as long as I can remember. To walk naked in God's Eternal Garden is my rest.
Friday, June 17, 2016
Horns and Drums
I was in a large building, standing quietly in my room. Some people came to me and told me that the building was on fire and that I needed to leave. I immediately left out of the room and left out of the building, but I did not see any fire, nor did I smell any smoke. However, I knew for certain that the building was on fire, but the flames had not yet risen. I got far away from that building.
The firefighters arrived; they came in 2 groups to fight the fire. The first group approached the burning building, and they sounded horns. Instead of using water to settle the fire, they sounded horns to play a soothing sound to put the fire out. The sound was like a thousand French horns, and very loud. Even though the sound was nice, it did not put out the fire, nor did I think it would - but those firefighters were convinced their horns would put the fire out. Seeing that the horns could not put out the fire, the second group of firefighters approached the fire. Instead of using water to settle the fire, they used drums to sound a rhythmic beat. The sound was that of a thousand drumsticks lightly but speedily tapping the heads of drums, and then picking up a beautiful rhythm. As I walked farther away from the building, I saw a friend of mine who I used to be very close with; she was among the drummers. I approached her, but she did not see me. So I stopped walking and gently touched her arm as she began to pass; she turned and looked at me with saddened eyes that appeared as if she did not really want to go to the burning building (which still hadn't yet been enveloped with flames), but still felt compelled to do so. We did not say anything to one other. She continued walking and was the last person in the line of drummers who approached the burning building.
I woke up from this dream very early in the morning, while it was still dark, and I still heard the drums playing. I had this dream on either March 25th or March 26th 2006, which was after I began seeking Yahweh, but before the messengers began flying in the skies above me.
With regards to those people playing the horns and drums, I did not see any horns or drums - the sounds just came from them in their attempt to put the fire out (which I also did not see - since I kept walking further and further away from the building).
The firefighters arrived; they came in 2 groups to fight the fire. The first group approached the burning building, and they sounded horns. Instead of using water to settle the fire, they sounded horns to play a soothing sound to put the fire out. The sound was like a thousand French horns, and very loud. Even though the sound was nice, it did not put out the fire, nor did I think it would - but those firefighters were convinced their horns would put the fire out. Seeing that the horns could not put out the fire, the second group of firefighters approached the fire. Instead of using water to settle the fire, they used drums to sound a rhythmic beat. The sound was that of a thousand drumsticks lightly but speedily tapping the heads of drums, and then picking up a beautiful rhythm. As I walked farther away from the building, I saw a friend of mine who I used to be very close with; she was among the drummers. I approached her, but she did not see me. So I stopped walking and gently touched her arm as she began to pass; she turned and looked at me with saddened eyes that appeared as if she did not really want to go to the burning building (which still hadn't yet been enveloped with flames), but still felt compelled to do so. We did not say anything to one other. She continued walking and was the last person in the line of drummers who approached the burning building.
I woke up from this dream very early in the morning, while it was still dark, and I still heard the drums playing. I had this dream on either March 25th or March 26th 2006, which was after I began seeking Yahweh, but before the messengers began flying in the skies above me.
With regards to those people playing the horns and drums, I did not see any horns or drums - the sounds just came from them in their attempt to put the fire out (which I also did not see - since I kept walking further and further away from the building).
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
An Introduction
I was raised Christian (Pentecostal). One Sunday, when I was about 15 years old (in the year 1994 or 1995), I was in church with my mother, my grandmother, and some of my grandmother's sisters, and a Christian prophet named Todd Hall came to our church to preach. If you were familiar with Christian prophets at that time, he gave out the normal holiness-church Christian mystical prophecies regarding financial blessings, gifts from heaven, spiritual warfare, etc. (Prophets at that time didn't have access to things like people's facebook and twitter feeds, so psychic-like cold-readings were kept to a minimum.) But Todd Hall then gave out a not-so-normal Christian prophecy that motivated me to hate myself and destroy my own love of human nature for almost a decade.
He gave a prophecy that went something like, "The Lord told me that in the year 2000, all of the homosexuals in the world are going to be burned alive in fire. God is going to burn them up." I remember the entire congregation cheered and celebrated.
In the midst of all their joy was this awfully FRIGHTENED 15 year-old, completely afraid. That man and that congregation had no idea how much he scared this gay teenager. I didn't want to be burned alive, and I didn't want "the Lord" to hate me. From that point forward in my life, I became your typical bible thumper and hated the fact that I had been attracted to men. I tried to like women, and I prayed almost every day to at least enjoy seeing a pair of tits. But I never could deny myself, sneaking into my uncle's bedroom when he wasn't home and looking at his porn stash, just to look at the naked men - I quickly flipped past any page that had some naked female model and feasted my eyes on the male form. And when my mother bought me a computer... and the internet...
As we all know, the year 2000 came and went, and no homosexual was burned alive (not by the Lord anyway). Nonetheless, Todd Hall (whom I have long-since forgiven) expected this from the god of his imagination - and so did the church, and so did I. As a result, I became this hypocritical, provocative, and arrogant "unfag" that became very religious and emotionally distraught.
A few years later in 1999, while still dealing with my self-hatred, I worked at Six Flags America in Largo, Maryland. While leaving the park one night, heading to the employee exit, I happened to gaze at the stars. Star gazing wasn’t something I normally did, but there was this odd-looking star in the sky that grabbed my attention. While walking and looking at this odd-looking star, the star shot off in a spiral and flew out into space at an incredible speed. I stopped walking and dropped my mouth in complete awe. I looked around to see if anyone else just saw what I had seen, but they were teenagers, running around and playing. I was dumbfounded and lonely. At that point in my life, I didn't want to see something like that; I was already fighting my attraction toward men, and now I'm seeing UFOs?! A friend of mine, who I'm still friends with, told me a few years ago that she remembers me asking her if she had seen the light in the sky that night (I probably sounded absolutely insane to her). Needless to say, this, along with my homosexual feelings, was something I didn’t feel comfortable talking about with anyone.
As the years went on, I read the bible, my faith tottered and I was no longer Christian. Then I stumbled across Brent's bible commentaries (http://www.awitness.org/bible_commentary/index.html) and tossed the book in the trash (it wasn't until later that I realized I tossed out a few pearls). I remember feeling like a great boulder had been lifted off me.
In the year 2005, I read in the Greek fragments of the Gospel of Thomas, the line where Yeshua said, "A person old in days will not hesitate to ask a child 7 days old about his place in life and he will live." I understood this with complete clarity, so I decided to 'try it out'. I went to God empty handed like a naked, pitiful, broken child, assuming nothing. Then YAHWEH, the God I did not know, answered me. I was first answered by large doses of compassion and mercy which have never ceased, then dream after dream explaining things, then those spacecrafts like the one I had seen all those years ago (who had later become messengers or ministering angels to me, and have never left). Brent, who is before me and has known God roughly 30 years longer than I, has been my help, speeding along my travels as he himself continues his journey.
Yahweh God said to me, "I am One. I am not part nor am I with anything; I became everything; I am everything, and I am more than everything. If you humbly seek my face, I will give you compassion. If you seek justice, I will be your defense. If you seek a faithful life, I will give it eternal. Your flesh will not undergo decay." This I received directly from the Living God.
Updated 3/23/2019
He gave a prophecy that went something like, "The Lord told me that in the year 2000, all of the homosexuals in the world are going to be burned alive in fire. God is going to burn them up." I remember the entire congregation cheered and celebrated.
In the midst of all their joy was this awfully FRIGHTENED 15 year-old, completely afraid. That man and that congregation had no idea how much he scared this gay teenager. I didn't want to be burned alive, and I didn't want "the Lord" to hate me. From that point forward in my life, I became your typical bible thumper and hated the fact that I had been attracted to men. I tried to like women, and I prayed almost every day to at least enjoy seeing a pair of tits. But I never could deny myself, sneaking into my uncle's bedroom when he wasn't home and looking at his porn stash, just to look at the naked men - I quickly flipped past any page that had some naked female model and feasted my eyes on the male form. And when my mother bought me a computer... and the internet...
As we all know, the year 2000 came and went, and no homosexual was burned alive (not by the Lord anyway). Nonetheless, Todd Hall (whom I have long-since forgiven) expected this from the god of his imagination - and so did the church, and so did I. As a result, I became this hypocritical, provocative, and arrogant "unfag" that became very religious and emotionally distraught.
A few years later in 1999, while still dealing with my self-hatred, I worked at Six Flags America in Largo, Maryland. While leaving the park one night, heading to the employee exit, I happened to gaze at the stars. Star gazing wasn’t something I normally did, but there was this odd-looking star in the sky that grabbed my attention. While walking and looking at this odd-looking star, the star shot off in a spiral and flew out into space at an incredible speed. I stopped walking and dropped my mouth in complete awe. I looked around to see if anyone else just saw what I had seen, but they were teenagers, running around and playing. I was dumbfounded and lonely. At that point in my life, I didn't want to see something like that; I was already fighting my attraction toward men, and now I'm seeing UFOs?! A friend of mine, who I'm still friends with, told me a few years ago that she remembers me asking her if she had seen the light in the sky that night (I probably sounded absolutely insane to her). Needless to say, this, along with my homosexual feelings, was something I didn’t feel comfortable talking about with anyone.
As the years went on, I read the bible, my faith tottered and I was no longer Christian. Then I stumbled across Brent's bible commentaries (http://www.awitness.org/bible_commentary/index.html) and tossed the book in the trash (it wasn't until later that I realized I tossed out a few pearls). I remember feeling like a great boulder had been lifted off me.
In the year 2005, I read in the Greek fragments of the Gospel of Thomas, the line where Yeshua said, "A person old in days will not hesitate to ask a child 7 days old about his place in life and he will live." I understood this with complete clarity, so I decided to 'try it out'. I went to God empty handed like a naked, pitiful, broken child, assuming nothing. Then YAHWEH, the God I did not know, answered me. I was first answered by large doses of compassion and mercy which have never ceased, then dream after dream explaining things, then those spacecrafts like the one I had seen all those years ago (who had later become messengers or ministering angels to me, and have never left). Brent, who is before me and has known God roughly 30 years longer than I, has been my help, speeding along my travels as he himself continues his journey.
Yahweh God said to me, "I am One. I am not part nor am I with anything; I became everything; I am everything, and I am more than everything. If you humbly seek my face, I will give you compassion. If you seek justice, I will be your defense. If you seek a faithful life, I will give it eternal. Your flesh will not undergo decay." This I received directly from the Living God.
Updated 3/23/2019
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